Hi guys, today i want to talk about something that has affected my life. This isn’t a minecraft, modding or coding related post – this is why i’ve put this specifically under personal. If you don’t want to read further, skip to the next post. I should have a fun post about the workshopcraft roadmap live shortly.
I’m 39 years old. I’m overweight. Not comedy level overweight, but enough to make it harder to find trousers and fit through tight spaces. I’ve been this weight for around 5 years. To clarify. I’m 17 stone. There are people at work who are heavier than me. 10 years ago i was just under 12 stone, an ideal weight. I’m not unfit. Before things went wrong i could lift anything up to 30 kilo’s without a problem.
2 years ago, i woke up like any normal morning with the alarm and thought “just 5 more minutes”. This was a mistake. I rolled over – at least my torso rolled over. Being a big guy, its not a gentle roll, rather a wrenching sharp rotation to give myself enough momentum to flip over. My hips didn’t follow and i twisted my pelvis out of alignment with my spine. I knew there was a problem straight away. I had the next 2 weeks off of work, saw the doctor, had some pain killers. The pain dropped to a level where i felt i might be able to go back to work but at this point i hadn’t seen anyone. I lasted 90 minutes at work before heading home again. This was when I went to the local chiropractor and had several sessions with her to sort out the alignment.
As far as i’m aware the bones are all where they are supposed to be but the muscles are another story. I’ve had numerous visits to the physio to try and sort out my back, i lost a stone in weight and at one point it was close to being tolerable but with the pressure and stress of the situation – the constant pain a lot of the time meant I put the weight back on. I spent a year on pain killers. I’ve been clear for the last 9-12 months except for a couple of days where the doctor suggested I take them at night but they don’t seem to have any effect now.
I’ve been suffering with the pain, and with the insomnia that comes with it. For a while I even tried to control the pain after a bad shift with alcohol but that was never a viable safe long term solution. Right now i’m taking 8 paracetamol a day to try take the edge off and avoid any lifting or too much movement. Yesterday was an exception to this and i’m paying the price today. I am going to need to redouble my dieting efforts and try and lose 4 stone. I am also going to have to become more active, some how, without affecting my back. Its a tricky trying to figure out how to balance this but if i cant then my back will never recover.
Work has been an issue lately. If my back becomes really bad (to the point i cant go in) i give them as much warning as I can – they are very understanding. I hate myself every time i do it because i feel like i’m letting them down, and my family down – every day i have off like this we lose money. Its becoming harder and harder to pay the bills. I’m looking for other jobs that are less stress on my back.
Now i have days where i’m down, but i refuse to be depressed. I am trying to stay positive. I’ve looked at the skills I have and the plan I have, while having a low chance for success is the best option right now. my kickstarter was turned down so i’m looking at other options. It’s there to give my body a rest from the stresses of work, allow me to set a diet that would otherwise cause problems working in a busy restaurant and most importantly, its there to give everyone a load more content for minecraft 1.10.2 and beyond.